I’m a mother of three young children. Their ages range from five to two. They are my life and the best mirror I’ve ever owned. Without my daughter’s insistence of “Drum Rolls!” on my belly (that makes my excess skin and belly fat move like Homer Simpsons)…

I may have never known my need for Yoga.

One fine morning, after avoiding Yoga, I was lounging on my couch. I lifted my arm above my head when my two year old son squealed in terror, “BUGS!”. I glanced down in alarm and saw nothing but unshaven armpit hair. Unshaven armpit hair that in a toddler’s twisted brain could pass for a nest full of baby spiders. So maybe I should shave more than “occasionally”.

My children – they are awesome at making me want to improve myself – unfortunately for them “wanting” to look better mostly translates to wearing baggy clothes.

So this morning, after skillfully neglecting yoga and forgetting to shave, I decided to get out of the house. I put on some makeup and wore clothes that were much too baggy and warm for the weather we’re having. I mean I’m unshaven and fat, I wasn’t about to wear shorts and a t-shirt!

Because I have no license I am forced to walk everywhere. No problem. Walking is exercise (yoga completed) and I’m not trying to impress anyone. On my way I decided to take a shortcut through the woods. A few meters in I saw THEM; teenage boys! I walked confidently. I let them get a load of this 30 year old gift of womanhood. When from the bush an insult was hurled at me…


Of all the unique names I’ve been called in my life, this was the most insulting.

I moved quickly, dodging the little pricks as much as possible. When I arrived at the grocery store I paused in front of the store window to get a good look at my reflection. I had to admit… there might have been a passing resemblance.