I’m not here to save humanity despite what many will come to believe. I work in research. My research may end the War but it’s not going to save anyone. If people could see half of what I know they wouldn’t want my proposal. Of course humanity has never been known for the long-term rational choice, only short-term mediocre solutions. I’m sure you’re asking why I continue with my work if such catastrophe could result – will result. As a scientist it’s not my position to determine what’s ethical only what’s possible; but more so, I am driven to develop the weapon before our enemy. If they were to gain this power – it would be used in unthinkable ways. So I will not falter. I will write my letters and guide the project from afar. I do all this despite knowing that this weapon will surely kill hundreds of thousands of civilians; men, women and children will suffer, but it will effectively end the War. The end of the War… it’s what we all want. Indeed, that’s what we told ourselves.
Now who’s to say how the idea came to me. If I ponder long enough the mathematical equation presents itself like the cadence of a poem. In fact, I have always believed that ‘pure mathematics is, in its way, the poetry of logical ideas’. The numbers guide me to my answers and offer me glimpses of a world that is beyond beautiful – it is intricate and miraculous. My theories, although vested in the quest to understand God’s greatest creations (energy, mass and speed of light) was the first paved stone on the path to hell. I learned what the enemy intended to do with my own damned work and I was livid. Although I pride myself on being a pacifist, their actions were so repellant that I could not allow them to come to the weapon before us. I did not consider that we would then be just as guilty of atrocity, and please believe me – despite what you may think – my intentions were good or at the very least not evil.
The phone call came on a beautiful summer day in August. I will never forget that call. The information that I provided to our allies ultimately became a weapon of mass destruction and resulted in the first of two devastating attacks upon our enemy. My scientific endeavour was considered a success and although my allies assumed I would rejoice, I mourned. This was not the reason I had come to love science and mathematics. I had never intended on being the principal reason why suffering should occur in this world.
I knew my weapon was death personified but I could not predict its results. People were vaporized or left horribly disfigured, others suffered for years with a deterioration of their internal organs. Some suffered with loss of hair, anemia, and the destruction of their white blood cells. There was bleeding and diarrhea, sterility and multiple types of cancer. I had helped to create a weapon so brutally fantastic that nearly every horrific way to die was encompassed within its awards. The government assured me that never again would the weapon be used. This did not assuage the guilt I carried, if anything, it made me fear the future like never before.
Only a year after my weapon was unleashed on the world the allies formed a committee that would oversee my creation as way to create energy for the industrialized nations. I was relieved to learn that the thing that had destroyed so many lives was to make amends and enrich the lives of millions more; but I have concerns and I wish to caution the world as to the detrimental effects of this creation should there be an accident…
This is not a power we should wield easily, nor should we come to believe in our own infallibility. This is a science that has not been thoroughly tested and we cannot possibly know the devastation it may reap. I speak up now because I know from experience that ‘the world is a dangerous place. Not because of those who do terrible things. But because of those who let them do it’.
I let them do this. I let them corrupt my research and I encouraged us to walk the path of the unknown so as to prevent this technology from falling into the wrong hands. Of course the wrong hands would turn out to be ours. ‘The release of atom power has changed everything except our way of thinking…the solution to this problem lies in the heart of mankind. If only I had known, I should have become a watchmaker’.
For all that I have done, I am sorry.
Sincerely,
Albert Einstein.
iasoupmama said:
What a fascinating imagining of Einstein’s conscience — very cool!
dalrie said:
Thank you! I’m not sure where it came from. I was writing something completely different – mad scientistesque and then I thought about the insane implications of Fukushima Daiichi nuclear plant and how we could very well be living the worst nuclear disaster EVER… it seems so surreal to me. So what does the inventor of nuclear energy think of that… Everything in ‘ quotations marks ‘ are true Einstein quotes. Heres another. “I made one great mistake in my life-when I signed the letter to president Roosevelt recommending that atom bombs be made but there was some justification–the danger that the Germans would make them’ – Einstein
I stretched Einsteins involvment a bit (for the story) but without his equation E=MC2 and his idea that a tiny bit of matter might hold a huge amount of energy, nuclear power would not have been invented so soon. Not to mention that it was on his recommendation that the bomb was made.
gem said:
Wow is all I can muster. I enjoyed the vivid writing and unique perspective.
dalrie said:
Thank you! 🙂
Michelle Longo said:
This was really excellent. It sounded like such an authentic voice. I loved it. LOVED it!
dalrie said:
Thanks!! That is such a compliment to me because you’re writing is so superb.
Stacie @ Snaps and Bits said:
I’m a scientist (biologist not physicist) so I really enjoyed this! If only such discoveries had been used only for good…
dalrie said:
I’m glad you liked my story since I was such a huge fan of yours! And you’re a scientist which is awesome! I have such respect for minds that discover, preserve and invent. I wish my brain worked that way!
Stacie @ Snaps and Bits said:
You wouldn’t know it reading this! I’m even more impressed knowing that you don’t have a science brain!! Really good job 🙂
dalrie said:
Aww thanks 🙂
the speakeasy (@YWspeakeasy) said:
It’s the same with anything, you know? Once you create art or make a discovery in science, people will see what was never intended. Ugh. Great letter!
dalrie said:
That is very true. Progress is defined in so many ways. Some people have very different ideas of what is progressive. Einstein could not have predicted that E=MC2 would become the building block of the worst weapon ever invented. The man was a pacifist for Gosh Sakes! He died feeling that his encouragement of the weapon was the worst mistake of his life. I cannot imagine what it would be to live with a regret as large as that.
christina said:
awesome take on things.
dalrie said:
Thank you!